Reborn

The Big Book amazingly promises that we will be reborn (p. 63). In Big Book context, Bill W. may have been referring to Dr. Carl Jung’s description of a spiritual experience: “Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them.” (p. 27). Of course, Bill himself had a near similar experience at Towns Hospital (p. 14).

I had a similar experience when I was about three months sober but had not yet worked the 12 Steps. Late one night while meditating on a pier of rocks protruding into the ocean in Santa Monica, California, I was overcome with a tremendous surge of energy and joy that sent me sprinting down the beach. This lasted a long time but had dissipated by the next morning. It occurred to me that I had experienced the same as Bill Wilson on page 14—perhaps I, too, had become “reborn!”

Alas, two months later I marched into a bar and almost ordered a gin and tonic. Thank God I didn’t, but I certainly had not had a spiritual experience as the Big Book defines it: “the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism.” (p. 567).

But as time passes, I realize that God has removed my mental obsession to drink alcohol so long as I remain in a fit spiritual condition. Indeed, the 10th Step promise on page 85 has happened: “Instead, the problem (mental obsession) has been removed. It does not exist for us.” In this context, I have been reborn!

By Bob S.