Step Five Rewards

My Fourth Step inventory focused the light of truth onto unrealized driving forces of selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. It also provided certain necessary tools to ‘face and to be rid of’ these newly discovered grosser handicaps. (Great reward!) But still, countless other destructive little demons, of the grosser variety, lurked in some dark, dank space deep inside.

They freely frolicked in this invisible environment, happily protected from the Sunlight of the Spirit. It was as though the grosser handicaps of selfishness, dishonest, resentment and fear were protected under a very opaque umbrella.

My sponsor informed me that Step Five was to include a detailed revelation of these defects of character and shortcomings. Those little demons and devils of conceit, jealousy, carelessness, intolerance, ill temper, and all the rest were about to be exposed—not only to my sponsor, but also to God!

Although my sponsor had not the power to close that umbrella, the Big Book tells me that God could and would if he were sought. (Those little fiends must have been trembling down there!). The sunlight of the Spirit was about to shine on those little demons—for they cannot survive in the sunlight of God’s Truth!

The Fifth Step promises, on page 75, tell us that we now begin to have a spiritual experience. Well, the realization that God will remove the very things that blocked us from seeing and acting on the truth indeed speaks to a radical inner transformation. I believe the main goal of this vital step is to allow us (me) to realize exactly what dominant inner forces have been blocking the truth; only then will I know exactly what imperfections to ask God to remove in Steps Six and Seven.

It was very important that I act before my mind decided to remember only what it wanted to remember. I believe that the Big Book timetable is very important here. We are told to do Step Four “at once,” Step Five at “first opportunity,” review for a short period and “then” (not later) do Step Six, go right into Step Seven “when ready.” Steps Five, Six and Seven are often referred to as the same day steps.

I am very happy that my sponsor, Carl, helped me close that umbrella via the Big Book directions. I haven’t had a drink of booze since!

By Bob S.